IF you are thinking of leaving an abusive relationship, it’s important to build a safety plan, whether you are living with your abuser or not.
Leaving is never easy, and often infuriates the abuser. They often promise they will change, and emotionally manipulate their partner into staying.
Abusers may also say things like “Nobody will ever want you but me,” or “This is all your fault. You make me act like this.”
Unfortunately, after hearing these abusive remarks over and over again you may have started to believe them. Try to be strong, and remember the abuse is not your fault, and you can and will be wanted and loved.
Planning a safe way to leave a relationship will help give you confidence and structure.
Safety plan for leaving an abusive relationship:Let a friend or family member know you are ending your relationship. Even if you don’t want to tell your friend or family member about the abuse, let them know you are ending your relationship, and need emotional support. Let them know when and where you are ending the relationship, and ask them to check in on you.
- Call a hotline. If you are uncomfortable talking with someone you know, call one of the hotlines and speak with someone who will encourage and support you.
2. Keep important documents safe. This includes your passport, birth certificate, health insurance card etc, and those of your children. Keep these in a safe space, preferably out of the home.
3. Find a safe place to go, even for a few nights
4. Call help center if your partner hurts you, threatens to hurt you, or threatens to hurt themselves
5.Memorize a few emergency contact numbers, in case you leave without your phone
6.Change passwords on electronic devices and social media, as your partner may know your passwords.
7. Block your partner from calling or texting you. You may need to be in touch again, but it is best to stop communication right after leaving.
8.Prepare emergency funds. This can include emergency money and your own bank account or credit card if possible
9. Remind yourself that you do not deserve to be abused. Write down in a journal or somewhere safe why you are important and do not deserve to be abused. Read and reread this to give you strength.
10. just do it . just do it , break up with him, there is a reason you thought of it and pushed break up to this level now, nothing should stop you now.
culled from zencare